What's that Smell?

Around 3:30 this morning I was awakened with a nose in my hand and a slight whine, Lucy was asking to go out.  Normally I just send her back to her bed, but I was feeling generous (if only I could see 5 minutes into the future!).  She's doing her business while I am standing in the garage in slippers and a robe when she goes tearing across the grass towards a G-I-A-N-T skunk.  Yes, you guessed the rest.

I got her back into the garage and I am overwhelmed by the smell of burnt garlic, not the smell that you typically associate with a skunk, but anyone who's been through the experience can verify this factoid.  Recently, 4 days ago actually, I printed off an email that my sister (Jennifer) had sent me on a concoction that supposedly works to clean your dog, should they get sprayed.  I had intended this weekend to purchase the necessary items should the unthinkable happen; as you know it's now a very thinkable scenario.  I decide I am going to have to run out to the store to get the necessary supplies so I jump in the car (after getting dressed, I don't want this to be out of order for you). I first tried Walmart and then the grocery store (Giant Eagle), both of which I thought were open 24 hours; surprise, nothing in the area is open all night except the gas station stores.  I tried two gas stations, attempting to steer clear of people because I am pretty sure I smell as bad as Lucy at this point.  Guess what, I came up empty.

I came home and bathed poor Lucy in the garage with whatever I could find that would be safe, she hated it and so did I.  She's shivering and trying to get away from me as I'm gagging on our collective stench.  The skunk was the only one enjoying the show and I am certain he was hanging out in a nearby bush pointing and laughing at the two of us.  

The garage is a lost cause I will likely have to burn it down and claim it as an "accident" on my insurance.  Although she never came in the house the smell is wafting in through the laundry room; it still smells pretty bad.  I might just burn the whole place and start over.  It's possible I tracked it in, I'm not sure.  All the windows are currently open, I am sitting hunkered down over the laptop sucking in the warm air that the fan is putting out, sipping tea, in 4 layers of clothes (that part is not far off what I am usually wearing).

I wanted to take her to the border for a DEEP CLEANING, maybe for both of us.  Unfortunately they don't do this.  So I am going to Walmart to pick up everything to try to resolve the current stench and to be prepared for next time.  I have no idea how bad I smell, but I am a little nervous about sickening others with the green haze that I am probably leaving behind me as I walk.  

Needless to say I called off work, I really have no idea if my shower did anything.  I am thinking about dipping myself in the cleaning solution I will be picking up to wash Lucy (I'm not kidding here readers!).  I am also a little worried about my car, it's currently raining, if it weren't I would put the car outside and roll down the windows, because I think it is pretty bad in there from my fruitless trip out to get supplies at 3:45A.M.!  Maybe I'll leave the car in the garage and burn that too, if not I am going to take it to the expensive car wash and see what they can do, they're going to love me.

I'll update you later on this continuing stinky saga....

ted & lucy